melodiesoflife | [Open] But you won't see me fall apart

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[Open] But you won't see me fall apart

WHO: Reno and YOU!
WHEN: Throughout the month of January, excepting the Enemy Within event
WHERE: Throughout Aqures Ixen; prompts below

The Hospital

"Wh... what do you mean, he's gone?"

"Well, he crystallized, kupo. He was taken to the hospital yesterday. But if you're Reno -- well, he had a letter for you -- "

Reno stood numb as the moogle explained and fetched the envelope for him. He remained numb throughout the day. At some point he must have left the house, though he didn't remember exactly how he got from there to anywhere. Grit was gone. First Kyo, and now... And Rufus had just arrived, too. Reno didn't know how he felt, except very confused and very, very lost. The time he spent at the hospital doubled as he watched over the two men, hoping someday he'd get to talk to them again. The boy he'd loved a world away, and the man who'd loved him without any hope of mutual affection. Reno felt as though he'd been robbed. So he did the only thing he could: remain in patient vigil, over them and over Yuki, waiting.

Palitutu's Lab

Reno continued to try his damnedest to crack Palitutu's passwords and finally get at what she'd hidden on her computer. He was making progress, he knew, slowly but surely. Still, it frustrated him that he hadn't broken it yet. He wanted to know what Palitutu was working on, what she knew, why she'd done what she had -- and he wanted to know now. Her knowledge about the crystals and the heroes could prove invaluable to everyone here; and, perhaps for selfish reasons, Reno hoped what he found could help reverse the crystallization process for heroes already trapped.

He sighed and rubbed his eyes, the burning sensation telling him he was long due for a break away from this screen.

The Pub...s...

If it wasn't one place, it was another. Old habits died hard, especially when circumstances acted as a catalyst. Whatever progress Reno had made against drinking as coping, it was slowly eroding -- as others guilty of the same probably noticed. Not that they'd likely stop each other. Things were easier to handle, or avoid, with a cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other.

B-04

Eventually, Reno would make his way "home." He had to. With Rufus in the city, he couldn't very well continue to stay with Yuffie and Vincent, leaving Rufus potentially vulnerable. He especially couldn't leave Rufus alone with Tifa. It just seemed to be asking for trouble. People would be able to find him more frequently at his home assignment, either in his room or around the premises. Tifa would be nearly impossible to avoid; Alice probably had forgotten everything about the strange redhead now slipping about the place. The women were hardly the most awkward of circumstances, though, as Reno attempted to make sharing a bedroom with Rufus as comfortable as humanly possible for them both.

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Yuffie raised an eyebrow as the soft chime of glass against wood met her ear. She turns and looks down at the drink that the bar tender placed in front of her. She takes it in her hand and shots it back quickly. She then makes a face and coughs slightly, she isn't used to whiskey.

"Another." Her voice was weak but the bartender agreed.

The ninja princess turned towards Reno. "Just wait for me to catch up at least." Fuck asking questions since Reno didn't seem keen to answer she's just going to get really drunk too. She's old enough to drink anyway.

Reno chuckled, though there wasn't much humor in the sound. "Yuffie, you try to catch up, you'll probably kill yerself. Or at least collapse before y' succeed. Do us both a favor, I don't wanna be responsible for gettin' you home, too. Gonna be hard enough t' walk by myself."

This was a stupid idea, his conscience still nagged at him, though it was getting more distant the more he drowned it. He should be sharp, he should be vigilant, he should be ready -- Rufus was here now, the Calamity was active again, he needed to be a Turk. But all he felt like doing right now was wallowing. Or maybe he'd pick a fight, just for the rush of being hit and getting to hit back. His conscience burbled that that would probably land him in one of Sparks' cells, but another glass was already being drained.

"Why are you even lookin' for me, anyway?" he asked, annoyed.

"Why do you think doofus!"

Was he really so blind as to not realize that she might actually worry about him? Yuffie sighed and began to sip her drink. Her head already felt fuzzy from shooting back the last one which wasn't how she usually drank on the rare points of time that she did drink.

"Rufus is here and still a jerk. I'm worried about you." She didn't even know his past with Rufus to know that him appearing would be trouble. Yuffie wasn't stupid.

"Also I don't want to have to walk you home."

Reno actually stopped and stared at Yuffie for a moment. "Worried...? Why?"

He hadn't thought about it. That was probably stupid on his part, but he honestly hadn't expected Yuffie to worry. She was AVALANCHE, after all, and brash, and barely more than a kid, why should she worry about him? And yet... she was. It was kind of a shock and he felt like an idiot for not realizing it sooner. He and Yuffie had become friends. And he hadn't been acting like one.

Reno sighed. "Yeah, Rufus is here. Guess you saw 'im." The fact that they didn't get along didn't surprise him.

She wasn't really part of AVALANCHE but that was currently a sore subject with Yuffie. She turned to face Reno and thought about what would happen if she kicked his chair out from under him. He'd go falling, it'd be a little funny and then he might realize that he's asking stupid questions.

"Yeah." Her tone was a lot shorter. "He's such an ass. I don't understand why you listen to him. He has no charisma at all."

He also pissed her off and was difficult and stubborn. Which didn't include all the awful shit he had done to Wutai and her personally.

Reno laughed again, somewhat bitterly, but he did smile. "His charisma isn't for everyone..."

Had Yuffie known just what that charisma had compelled Reno to do, he'd be insulted. But she didn't. As it was, he simply felt foolish to be reminded. He traced his finger through some of the glass's condensation left on the table, skin squeaking slightly against the wood.

"It's complicated. But I'm not surprised you don't like 'im."

"Guess he's just a jerk to me then."

Yuffie pouted slightly as she turned back towards her drink. She took the cup lightly between her fingers and took a small sip. She winched again as the pungent liquid slipped down her throat. "That's not far." She mumbled softly as she turned back towards Reno. Her hand lightly scratched the back of her head.

"So are you drinking because Rufus is here or something else?"

Slide. Squeak. Reno frowned at the wet marks he left on the table, thinking before finally answering.

"A little of both?" He sighed and closed his eyes. "Just a lot happening all at once, Yuff. Rufus is here, which is... hard... an' the circumstances are less than ideal. The Calamity is startin' back up again, I'm ready t' fuckin' throw Palitutu's computers out the fuckin' window, an' heroes are gettin' crystallized again..."

He massaged his eyes. That was probably the last straw, if he had to guess. Dealing with Rufus and all the uncomfortable feelings that brought up wouldn't have been as bad if he'd had someone to talk to about it. But then Grit was gone -- probably the only person Reno would have told. And after reading the letter left behind, he only felt more lost.

"I'm just tired."

Yuffie flicked Reno's forehead.

"Hey! We're all going through that shit. So either tell me what's really bothering you or I'm gonna drag you home and get Vince to do story time." At which he would have to listen. Besides she missed him coming over and it's been annoyingly less frequent than before.

If he hadn't come over while Vincent was in Crystal Stasis she'd probably have gone crazy. "Besides... sometimes people in stasis come back. Sometimes they don't. We at least know that there is a chance and that they are safe." It's something thought something very small.

Reno winced. "Ow...!" He rubbed his forehead, not sure how Story Time would really be a punishment besides being incredibly awkward for all involved. But speaking of awkward... Should he tell Yuffie? Could he tell Yuffie? Certainly not everything, but where would he draw the line?

He didn't exactly look forward to being judged for his sex life, or lack thereof, and he half expected it from her.

"Fuck." Where to even start? "Yeah, Rufus is here. An' the last time I saw him, we had a huge fight. I stormed off an' left him, an' he ended up hospitalized."

It wasn't technically a lie -- it had ended that way. Rufus disappeared soon after. Reno just cut out the part about how the argument regarded physical intimacy, and had been one of a few.

"Now housing has us sharing a bedroom, which is awkward as hell, even if he doesn't remember the same stuff. And I wanted t' talk to Grit about... things... but he's crystallized. An' he left me a letter about stuff that happened between us in the world he came from, and... I just feel like shit."

He wanted to lean on Johnny, or Sheena. But he felt guilty and selfish if he dragged them into things -- primarily because he knew they'd go along with it. They were too nice. How did he manage to sleep with such nice people?

"I hope crystal stasis doesn't last," he sighed. But Yuffie was right -- even though Angeal hadn't come back, she had. And Vincent had. So maybe someday the others would, too. Reno just didn't like the wait, or the uncertainty over whether or not the bodies really were "safe." After all, those moogles had managed to possess them with that dark magic before.

"... Yuffie, you knew Kyo here before I arrived, right?" he asked quietly after a moment. "... What was he like?"

She listened to everything that Reno had to say before letting a sigh leave her lips. She could understand that even without details. "You know I'm still fighting with Tif... shit happens between friends and it might take time but you shouldn't force yourself." She hadn't spoken to Tifa in months.

"Kyo?" She blinked surprised to be reminded about that name. "Well yeah, he was younger than I am and sorta grumpy."

Yuffie smiled at the memory, she can't help but enjoy grumpy people. "He didn't believe all this stuff and he stopped his foot and was all angry. I only teased him a little and he got so upset."

She looked over at Reno. "You said you knew him. How? You guys date or something?" Because Reno is gay right?

Reno was silent. And he continued to stare at the table. And as the silence dragged on, it was as much an affirmative answer as saying yes. They had dated -- more than dated. And this would do nothing to convince Yuffie that Reno was not, in fact, completely gay.

"He was older..." was all he could really offer, which wasn't much.

"Yeah I get the weird timeline thing this world does."

She waved a hand before scooting a little closer to Reno's side. She lightly bumped her shoulder against his with an encouraging smile. "Look if that's it. I totally understand why things suck but I don't think you'll feel better here."

She paused and then lightly tapped her chin.

"Why not grab your drink and follow me. I have an idea." There were things that always cheered her up, more so after the complications with her and her last boyfriend in Crystallis.

"I'm not gay!" Reno growled, preempting any statement Yuffie could have made about it. He was expecting it sooner or later -- knew she thought it. It was annoying, that's what it was. And he was already on a short fuse. Even if he knew Yuffie was trying to help...

He glanced up with a confused frown. But he had to admit, he was curious. Fine -- what the hell. He'd go.

Yuffie blinked. “I don’t remember accusing you of being gay… though I was definitely thinking about it.” For the moment she forgot where she wanted to lead him and just stared at him. “How can I not? I only see you hitting on guys and you barely spare me a glance. I would like to inform you that’s I am very pretty.” In case he didn’t get her point she stuck out her tongue and downed her drink.

A chill crawled up Yuffie’s spine and it was only after it paused that she spoke again. “Anyway I don’t care. You can do what you want but I’m your friend now so I’m going to cheer you up.”

She smiled.

“You have to deal with that fact. So come on.”

She lead him away from the bar and out into the street. She was trying to remember where to go or where she wanted to go. Usually to cheer up she beat the crap outta something but given the fact that Reno’s drunk that wasn’t really a fair fight. “This way.” She pulled him by the wrist leading back towards her and Vincent’s house.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm gay because I don't hit on you," Reno grumbled as he nonetheless rose and followed Yuffie outside. "Great logic. Real pretty tongue there, too, princess, yeah that's a real attractive look. If I knew you wanted physical proof, I woulda' asked Yuna an' Sheena if they minded a creepy voyeur watching us first -- "

Shit. Shit shit. Foot in mouth. He hardly believed the two women had said anything to anyone; in fact he got the distinct impression that Yuna had become very close with that Fai guy, and they probably didn't want him opening his big mouth about things. Sheena might not even remember it! Shit.

"Uh, never mind, I mean, hey where are we going...?"

Yuffie listened to Reno's little rant and found it not only insulting to her but also to the two girls he had mentioned. First of all, she really liked Sheena and she didn't want her anywhere near this creep and she didn't know Yuna but she assumed neither of them wanted to be spoken about like some conquests.

Before Reno could react, most likely because he's drunk, Yuffie moved. She turned on her heel and then kneed Reno in the gut. In case he threw up she took a quick step back.

"That was mean." Her tone was harsh and sharp with her eyes narrowing down at him. "I understand that you feel like crap but you shouldn't talk about people like that." She always knew that Reno was an ass but for a few weeks she must have forgotten that fact.

"HRGH!" Reno doubled over with a grunt, clutching his stomach. He gagged but thankfully managed not to vomit. Coughing, gasping for his breath back, he glared up at Yuffie with glassy eyes.

"You say that like yer surprised," he croaked hoarsely. "I'm mean."

It wasn't entirely true... not anymore. But he was raw and he was hurting, and he was pushing Yuffie away even if, deep down, he did want her company. Anyone's company, really. But he and Yuffie had formed some kind of bond since he'd arrived, against the odds, and it was weird but he might actually like it. It was nice. Which was why he didn't deserve it.

“Like hell you are.”

Yuffie’s eyes narrowed at him. He could say what he wanted but she knew that he wasn’t the ass he used to be because the Reno he used to be wouldn’t have even given her the time of day. It wasn’t as if the Wutai princess had anything he could use, more so in this world. She only came across the Turks because Cloud and the others did.

“If you want to fall back into being that jerk fine but you’re only going to push away the friends you’ve made.” Like Johnny, who she knows was someone that Reno cared about.

Reno glared at her for awhile, internally wrestling with himself. He could keep it up, chase her off and in the end, punish himself with more loneliness. But that was why he was in this mess to begin with, when he thought about it. Loneliness. Losing Kyo, losing his friends on Atia, being thrust upon people from Gaia he'd lost two years earlier. And then restarting the cycle and losing Grit.

He thought back to the nights he'd spent with Yuffie, the nights when Vincent had been crystallized himself. The nightmares she'd had; the nightmares he'd had. But things had been better just to be beside someone.

Reno swallowed and straightened. "Sorry," he managed quietly. "That was... I'm sorry."

It wasn't his strong suit, and it twisted his gut uncomfortably, but apologizing really was the better choice.

Hearing him apologize made her pause and stare at him. She wasn't expecting that and wasn't sure what to say. She paused for a moment before releasing a slow breath.

"Okay but don't be such a jerk next time." Next time he felt like crap and yuffie was nice enough to try and cheer him up. She lightly took his hand pulling him along with her as they made their way back to her house. It was a path that was most likely familiar to Reno now making their destination no mystery.

"Come on." She looked back at him with a smirk. "I'm not about to leave you upset, drunk and on your own."

Which meant they were going to have a sleep over and Reno can complain or be silent but he wouldn't be alone.

"Yeah, well... I'll do my best." Being nice was kind of a new development for him. It still wasn't his gut reaction, not when he was feeling wounded. But he'd try.

Slowly, the path became apparent to him. Familiar streets, houses, the way back toward their homes. Likely Yuffie's.

"Sleepover?" he guessed.

"Duh."

Yuffie grinned at him with an obvious smile before continuing forward. She didn't think sleepovers were bad. If anything it meant that you didn't have to sleep alone and she was comfortable around Reno at this point.

"Unless that's a problem Mr. Drunk Paints."

Reno managed a smile. "Nah. I think I'll manage t' live through it. Cocoa?"

Some cocoa, some bitching, and maybe a pillow fort. It was childish and stupid, and it sounded so good.

"Duh!"

Yuffie giggled before taking Reno's arm and pulling him along. It was nice to have a friend where you didn't give a damn what they thought. It made it easier to talk to them.

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[Open] But you won't see me fall apart

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wrap up soon?

Let's end here